Belonging

It has become a buzz word in some circles, a core value in other circles and controversial in other circles. "Belonging" has morphed into a term often aligned with agendas and philosophies and used as a weapon in some culture wars.

At the core of who we are, I suspect that everyone wants to feel included, accepted, and well, like they belong. Many of us have struggled with feeling included from our earliest memories on the playground. We have stories of being left out, made fun of, excluded for all kinds of reasons. We can probably all think back to those who bullied us and name the mean girls of our youth. So if this lack-of-inclusion is a common human experience, how did this core need to belong get so politicized?

I think belonging is key to healthy identity and healthy relationships. I'm glad it's getting the attention it deserves. While we wrestle with its application in personal and professional circles, here's what I vow to those in my personal and professional life:

✔ I don't have to agree with you to accept you. I can differ with you on many issues, values and worldviews, and I will not exclude you from the circle.

✔ You are safe with me. I will not seek to cause you harm, make fun of you or dismiss you. I will not dehumanize or "other" you or participate in conversations that do.

✔ I will find ways to include you. I will communicate, connect and appreciate your contribution.

✔ I will seek to learn from you. I will listen, seek to understand and value your vantage point and perspective.

I want people to feel like they belong with me. These commitments are one tangible way to show that desire and be accountable to those in my circle. What say you?

-Mindy Muller, CFRE, President/CEO of CDP

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